New Caledonia is the perfect winter escape. Soak up another culture, speak another language, enjoy delicious food, and seriously slow down. If the thought of a 24 hour flight from Sydney to Paris with children terrifies you as much as it terrifies me, than New Caledonia is the place for you!
At just a 2.5 hour plane trip (Sydney to Noumea), I really can’t believe that I haven’t visited this island sooner. That said, I really don’t want it to become too touristy either. It’s natural beauty could be easily spoiled.
Speaking French in New Caledonia
To be fare, I think my experience of Noumea, New Caledonia was a bit different to most Australians. I believe most Australians, unlike Japanese and New Zealand tourists, don’t attempt to speak French. But I took this holiday as an opportunity to learn French.
It was a little tricky, because more than one local told me that my accent was brilliant, and that I look French. So, when my ability to say what I needed to say in French faulted me, the locals were confused. Nothing a simple “I’m sorry, I live in Australia, I only speak a little bit of French”, didn’t fix. The locals were totally chuffed that I was trying to speak their language. If they didn’t speak English, they would ask someone in the crowd to translate for them. That is if someone hadn’t already willingly jumped in to help me with a huge smile on their face.
I did see some Aussies get royally served for speaking English to people and just assuming they knew what they were saying. This made me laugh out loud. Every Australian isn’t bi-lingual, so we shouldn’t expect others to speak English when we travel.
Our Experience
Our first day in Noumea was great fun for all of us. We walked seven minutes from the Hilton hotel to the aquarium. Turns out it doesn’t open until 10am, so we chilled out on the beach for a while.
Mark and Olivia sat quietly chatting on a bench whilst Lara and I roamed along the beach. She collected shells and corals that were different to what we find on our beaches at home. I collected the same plastics that we find on Sydney’s beaches. This really shocked me since there is a beautiful reef where you can see people snorkeling every day.
As expected, we loved the baguettes, croissants and pain au chocolat. Despite all the walking we did to and from dinners, and the aquarium, my ass still devoured my swimming costume. As the girls said all holiday “mermaid hair, don’t care”. It’s easy to see my family and I spending a lot more time in New Caledonia. The people are so happy and genuine. The pace of life suits me perfectly-all they need is some good coffee and I would happily hibernate there over Sydney’s winter.
How can we fund a three month holiday?
New Caledonia Weather
When we finally met up with Mark and the sailing crew in Noumea, we blamed them for dragging Sydney’s windy weather with them. But it was warm and not raining, so we were happy. We’re a family of sailors, of course we love the wind in our hair.
Noumea Aquarium
Once we were in the aquarium we were gobsmacked by the gorgeous reef that had been recreated in the tanks. We saw lots of interesting species, including the nautilus which Mark identified and taught me about. They are strange and fascinating creatures. But I think the family favourite was when we found a quiet little theatre tucked away around a corner where we could all have some seriously needed chill time.
Getting to Noumea had been a big effort for all of us, and watching the rays glide around peacefully set the mood for our family holiday.
After thoroughly enjoying the aquarium, chilling out with the rays, and chatting to the turtles it was time to head to the market. To be honest, our first day of holidays ticked the only two boxes I had for Noumea. So I was pretty chuffed going to the aquarium and the markets all in one day. And the girls were pretty happy to get their first bus tickets as we ventured in to town.
The Market
As we entered the markets the first thing Mark and the girls spotted were coconuts. So we did what all tourists do, and got one. Surprisingly I liked the coconut juice. Not surprisingly Olivia wasn’t a fan. But it was very entertaining to watch Lara claim the coconut from her Dad. From then on, Lara would point out all the coconuts on the ground and want to drink them, only we didn’t have a machete on holidays.
Whilst we were at the markets I was rather impressed with the girls shopping skills. Lara found great cucumbers, whilst Olivia bought some delicious carrots. This was lucky, because apart from those purchases they lived on chicken nuggets and chips for the whole holiday. So much so that they can perfectly order that meal in French.
New Caledonia Restaurants
After a big day adventuring, it was time to go and get a late lunch. We thoroughly enjoyed everything we ordered at Chez Toto, a French bistro that the locals go to. Here I continued to impress Mark with my French, and annoy Lara. Whilst still getting frustrated with myself for not being able to say everything I wanted to say. But the locals were extremely helpful, and we ordered our lunch without any troubles.
After a big day exploring my family was tired, but I had the new found energy of someone in a new country, speaking a new language, wanting to see, do and taste everything. So, when they announced that they wanted some quiet time in the room, I revelled at the opportunity for some seriously needed me time. I bounced down to reception and asked them where to get the best baguettes from. Then I skipped two minutes down the road to L’Atelier Gourmand, merrily saying ‘bonjour!’ to everyone I past.
Boulangerie
As I got closer to the boulangerie it was obvious that I was in the right place as the sweet smell of baguettes drifted out the door, just like the cue for them. These are exactly what you need when you are planning a simple Friday night wine and cheese night in. It’s tradition.
Our five nights in Noumea seemed to speed by, as we enjoyed crew dinners, and a prize giving night at the yacht club. Plus a day trip to the Great South, before flying over to the Isle of Pines.
Summary
1. Get lunch baguettes from L’Atelier Gourmand. Go back later in the day for lots of baguettes for wine and cheese night. The boulangerie bakes them all day long from 5am to 7pm.
2. If you plan on enjoying a nice quiet wine in your room, buy alcohol early. They have strange licensing laws in New Caledonia, which stop you from buying alcohol after 12 noon.
3. Catch a bus up to the Simply Market to grab some delicious cheeses, and snacks. New Caledonia is expensive, and the corner stores will send you bankrupt. So if you are holidaying with kids, a stop there is a must.
4. The aquarium is a must for everyone. You don’t need kids to enjoy it. Go and learn something about the majestic reefs of New Caledonia. Make friends with a ray and a turtle. Then go and pick up plastic off the beach 🙂
5. Chez Toto and Le Miretti-Gascon (where the Maitre D won me over by telling my crazy kids she would put them in the freezer), are two traditional French restaurants that I recommend. Chez Toto is in town, and Le Miretti-Gascon is a lovely walk from the Hilton hotel.
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